I grew up in a religion that taught me that I didn't have authority over myself. I was taught that there were men who had power and authority over me, and they were who I went to for Revelation, for guidance, and ultimately who knew better what was best for me than I did.

 I never resonated with this, I really never bought into the concept that someone else had more authority in my life than I did. But it still manifested itself in ways in my life. As a child I didn't always trust myself, and as a young woman I struggled with trusting myself and seeing myself as my own authority.


The word authority has sort of a prickly feeling to me. It’s one of those words that causes conflict inside of us. Who really is the authority?

How do we become the authority in our own lives?


Here are a few thoughts that I have on this subject, as I have worked on it most of my life.


I am the ultimate authority in my own life and you are the ultimate authority in your life. Regardless of what artificial situations have been set up in our lives, our choices are the only ones that really matter when it comes to the direction of our lives.


How do we get our own authority back when it has been taken by someone else? First we have to recognize that we probably gave it away, even though we didn't realize it at the time.


Taking authority back means being assertive, being honest with our feelings, and our needs. It also means not giving our power away to someone else, even if we are afraid, even if we are unsure about our next move, or if someone else is aggressive toward us. 


The word authority literally means the power or right to give orders, make decisions, and enforce obedience. I certainly don't want anyone enforcing obedience on me, although I do think that I have to be obedient to myself.


The word authority means to have the power to make decisions. When we have authority over ourselves we have the power to make our own decisions. This is a key element of having authority in your own life. Do you make your own decisions? Are they based on what you want?


Here is a checklist to determine if you are the authority in your own life.


*You trust yourself, and make choices that benefit you.


*You are not afraid to stand up to someone who tries to take your authority, and you recognize that this is a violation of your own personal rights and not something you will tolerate.


*You have your own philosophy or personal code that guides you and your decision-making and guides the direction of your life.


*You respect the right of other people to have authority over their own lives, and encourage them to make choices that make them happy.


*You respect the authority of those in power in your government or in your community, as long as that authority does not infringe upon your right to choose your own happiness.


*You stand up for yourself and other people when a larger authority oversteps and tries to take away a person's rights to personal safety, happiness, and protection.


*You take responsibility for your choices and your actions and recognize that being your own authority means that you are truly responsible for yourself.


Much love,



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